i like to fork myself

Don McClean, Mr American Pie, had a reputation for bringing groupies back to his hotel room for what he liked to call "dick autographs". The closest I've come to fulfilling such band-aid wet dreams is some Waratah sticking his unwanted finger up my arse in the disgusting meat market commonly known as level 2 of Cargo Bar. How many Cargo Bar frequenters want to stick their finger up pretty lady's dresses or want to have the finger of man-in-jeans-and-loafers-and-collared-shirt stuck up their dress? Most of them. That same night I was standing behind Ric from Home and Away at the ATM. I tried to look at his pin number. It started with a 4. That leaves only 1000 possible combinations. As opposed to 10 000. That was about as good as it got for me ar Cargo Bar, and I imagine anyone else with a scintilla of superability.

If you do one thing this week, go somewhere more novel than Cargo Bar. If you do two things, listen to some Crackpot - so icily chilled to get you through the weeks. If you do three, google Daul (she's a wet dream).


Crackpot - Sat Day Night

Crackpot - Planes


Run!

R